I've always thought most of the quirky, unbelievable, odd, hilarious, humiliating, ridiculous, painful, bizarre and even heart-breaking moments of my life would make a PERFECT sitcom ... Some situation that would be a classic Ross story from "Friends" or even an Elaine tale from "Seinfeld" (no ... I do NOT dance like her, thank heavens!)
Here is a quick rundown of some classics in Jenn's life:
* The Peppermint Head doll. Ok, this is a lengthy story that is worth a whole post, but the quick version is this was a "Doll" adorned in starlight mints that a so-called boyfriend (I use that term VERY loosely) gave me for Valentine's Day. HORRIFYING!
* Being run over (nearly knocked down) by a car while walking through the parking lot at work. And ... it was a hit and run!
* Having my home and car broken into a total of 3 times ... all within 1 year. The cell phone being the victim all 3 times.
* Fainting a couple of times while working on stories for the newspaper.
* 3-inch-long cockroach crawling through my hair while I slept.
* Falling down the stairs (falling is a common occurrence in my life) and not only seriously bruising my fanny, but actually causing a deformity.
* Being attacked by a cat in the middle of the night.
* Exploding television sets.
And the list could go on and on and on...
I was recently reminded of a CLASSIC moment in the dating realm of my life...
Online dating has never been that big of a deal for me. Maybe I’m a little too trusting. Maybe I’m a tad naïve. Maybe I’m overly hopeful. At any rate, I have had many a date where we “met” online.
The most memorable, and actually one of my first, online dates was with a guy we’ll call “Jackson”. After emailing back and forth, texting and talking on the phone for several weeks, we decided to meet up for lunch.
My dad, who thinks himself quite the clever comedian and prank-instigator, mentioned how humorous it would be to spook this blind date.
“Ask him if he has experience with wheelchairs,” he said with a devious grin. “And then tell him you’re going to need help getting from your car to the restaurant.” Knowing full well teasing this unsuspecting guy and making him think I’m wheelchair-bound would not be nice, I of course kept Dad’s idea to myself.
D-day arrived and I met Jackson at the restaurant and everything went smoothly. Conversation was quite comfortable. In fact, it felt so comfortable I decided to relate my dad’s prankster idea, laughing near-hysterically as I told the story.
“Actually,” Jackson began … “my daughter is in a wheelchair.”
Oh My GOSH! I was so embarrassed, mortified, floored and shocked!
Needless to say, Dad doesn’t get involved in the “planning” of my online or blind dates anymore.
Here is a quick rundown of some classics in Jenn's life:
* The Peppermint Head doll. Ok, this is a lengthy story that is worth a whole post, but the quick version is this was a "Doll" adorned in starlight mints that a so-called boyfriend (I use that term VERY loosely) gave me for Valentine's Day. HORRIFYING!
* Being run over (nearly knocked down) by a car while walking through the parking lot at work. And ... it was a hit and run!
* Having my home and car broken into a total of 3 times ... all within 1 year. The cell phone being the victim all 3 times.
* Fainting a couple of times while working on stories for the newspaper.
* 3-inch-long cockroach crawling through my hair while I slept.
* Falling down the stairs (falling is a common occurrence in my life) and not only seriously bruising my fanny, but actually causing a deformity.
* Being attacked by a cat in the middle of the night.
* Exploding television sets.
And the list could go on and on and on...
I was recently reminded of a CLASSIC moment in the dating realm of my life...
Online dating has never been that big of a deal for me. Maybe I’m a little too trusting. Maybe I’m a tad naïve. Maybe I’m overly hopeful. At any rate, I have had many a date where we “met” online.
The most memorable, and actually one of my first, online dates was with a guy we’ll call “Jackson”. After emailing back and forth, texting and talking on the phone for several weeks, we decided to meet up for lunch.
My dad, who thinks himself quite the clever comedian and prank-instigator, mentioned how humorous it would be to spook this blind date.
“Ask him if he has experience with wheelchairs,” he said with a devious grin. “And then tell him you’re going to need help getting from your car to the restaurant.” Knowing full well teasing this unsuspecting guy and making him think I’m wheelchair-bound would not be nice, I of course kept Dad’s idea to myself.
D-day arrived and I met Jackson at the restaurant and everything went smoothly. Conversation was quite comfortable. In fact, it felt so comfortable I decided to relate my dad’s prankster idea, laughing near-hysterically as I told the story.
“Actually,” Jackson began … “my daughter is in a wheelchair.”
Oh My GOSH! I was so embarrassed, mortified, floored and shocked!
Needless to say, Dad doesn’t get involved in the “planning” of my online or blind dates anymore.
ha! so how did the rest of the date go? awkward, no doubt...
ReplyDeleteCOMPLETELY awkward! I felt so stupid! And I called him on my drive home and apologized like 12 times. Needless to say ... that was our only date. We chatted for a few weeks longer, but then he showed up at a family Christmas dinner with a fiance -- like 3 weeks after we went out! (I knew a friend of his family and got the scoop)
ReplyDeleteOh my goodness! That is insane. So funny though, I'm glad you've survived all these crazy happenings.
ReplyDeleteI would like to get a few more details on some of them, I'm sure they've got some good juicy details. Did you get a picture of the peppermint doll?!?!? :o)
My favorite is the cat attack. Oh, that still makes me laugh ... I know it was real and painful, but still, you gotta admit -- a cat attacking in the middle of the night? Pretty funny.
ReplyDeleteI TOTALLY agree, Rachel! The cat attack was clearly the most bizarre thing that's happened to me! I still have that stinking scar! And a strong, renewed loathing for cats! (sorry cat lovers out there ... if you'd been attacked like I was, you'd understand). I need to blog about that night. I have a horrible photo somewhere just waiting to be posted here! haha!!
ReplyDeleteAnd Emilie ... No photo of the Peppermint Head Doll! I'm still sad I didn't get a photo. I might be able to track one down somehow... But the story will come soon. It's a classic tale of LOVE and FRESH BREATH.
UUMM Why have I not heard of this story?? You need to fill me in,in the morning, I know where you work. I will find you..
ReplyDeleteJenn I have seen you dance and I hate to break it to you but...
ReplyDelete